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I know this issue has been a long time in coming. Sometimes, things are just exceptionally hard to write. This is one of those things. After three months of silence I know it is time.
On July 2 the disk in my back ruptured, putting me into excruciating pain. After the first rupture and all the damage it caused seven years ago I didn't realize any disk matter was left.
Herbs and natural remedies could not touch the pain. Strong drugs helped some. On July 7th I had back surgery in hopes of avoiding more nerve damage and months of pain. “It was really big,” the doctor said, “you must have been in a lot of pain.”
That pain in the physical was a shadow of pain coming emotionally.
On Friday, July 13th I received one of those phone calls we all dread. My mother passed away in the dark early morning hours following a medical procedure. I wanted to not just suggest, but beg her not to have it, to wait until she was stronger. It was one time I wished the nagging in my head had been wrong.
My mother was one of my biggest cheerleaders. She was the hub of our family and a source of inspiration and learning. Despite her many health problems over the years, she always had a smile and a laugh. My family and I surely miss her.
Sometimes, the decisions we make can only be confirmed as wise, or not, in hindsight. One decision I wisely made was opting for surgery right away. In uncharacteristic fashion, I wavered, but did not procrastinate. When that awful phone call came, the reason was clear. I could have never made that car ride, even as a passenger, had surgery been delayed or refused.
Another major decision that revealed divine guidance and love, was adopting our new family member, Teddy. He came to us as a foster dog needing medical care after being grossly neglected and dumped. He wormed his way into our hearts and quickly made himself at home, even though I thought I really didn't want another dog for a while.
On the heels of losing my Lou, followed by back problems and my mother’s passing, I realize the loss and emotional overwhelm would have been too much had this little bundle of joyous life not come into our lives.
Through the grievous blur of July and August, my intention was for emotional and physical healing. I knew for that to happen, waves of feeling and tears had to be embraced and honored.
I honored the space needed, including shutting down my writing and usual studying, even though I felt a little guilty. Thank God I was on summer ‘vacation’.
Now, even though the grieving process continues, I have more and more better moments. I know the best way to honor my mother is to live a meaningful life and to be happy. That was her greatest wish for us. It is time again to start making the most of this life of mine.
Updates and Things to Come
I have begun the massive project of updating the web sites. Our TapInfinity blog has a new look and is mobile-friendly so you can read articles easily on your mobile devices.
Holistic MindBody Healing also has a new look that will eventually be customized. Pages are in the process of being updated and navigation improved.
Your members area has also been updated. (password: members) Everything is now on one page so it is easier to get to. Videos have been scaled back and will be rotated periodically with new ones.
Some of you have asked me for the opportunity to guest blog. I am very excited to have members and visitors who are wise and skilled in holistic healing. So yes, you may now submit original articles for consideration in the community pages for the benefit of our readers. Looking forward to reading yours!
Next time I will update you on changes I have planned for the ezine that I think you will like and find beneficial. If you have suggestions for the ezine or site, please let me know.
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Until next time,
Wishing you happiness, healing, and wellness by design.
Until next time,